Back to routine!

We are only on day 2 of the new school year and

back to routine!

Have you ever looked at your life and realised that you do almost exactly the same thing at almost exactly the same time almost every day of the year….some would call it routine, some would call it mundane, some would call it, well I don’t know….some would just call it life!

It is so easy to fall into the trap of just getting on and doing what we have to do….the times on the school run, I have had the conversation with one or more of my children about just how many times I’ve driven this exact route over nearly 16 years, how many miles I must’ve clocked up.   I don’t even have to think about how to get to school now, sometimes I reach the gates and wonder how I actually got there ….which almost backs up my reply to my children I reckon I could do it blindfolded!

I have to admit that I can probably be a bit guilty of doing the head down and just get on!  We can find ourselves just getting through the days, getting the through the routine, getting through the same old, same old…..heads down, eyes practically closed, not seeing, not noticing anything other than what we have to do.

Today I was reminded by what I saw….. yes you may do the same thing at the same time every day and you really may well be able to do it with your eyes shut, even with a blindfold on….however, if that were the case, you would miss so much that is going on around you.  And, to be honest, how much are we already missing because our heads are down and we are just getting on?  

There’s a challenge for us all this year – everyday, whatever we are doing, however routine or ‘mundane’ we think things are… to lift up our heads, open our eyes and, to really see what is happening around us…to see who is around us and then see if there is something that we can do for someone else, to help them out with their ‘routine’ or their ‘mundane’.  If we all did that for someone, and someone did that for us, how much nicer would the ‘routine’ be?

“From the rising of the sun to its going down
The Lord’s name is to be praised”.

Psalm 113:3

Uh-oh! It’s the end of another year…..

I’ve lost count of the amount of people I’ve spoken to lately who have all questioned where 2018 has gone!  Seriously, looking back to this time last year, I was shocked at how fast the year previously had gone, but 2018 has been something else!  It’s frightening that time seems to be going by so quickly and every time I suggest such a thing, my husband ‘lovingly’ reassures me there are 24 hours in every single day, 60 minutes in each hour and an hour is still made up of the same amount of  time that it always has been…..no 2018 hasn’t gone any faster than any other year!  The more ‘mature’ aged people I spend time with have just assured me it’s a sign you’re getting older when the time starts going quickly.  As if I needed that reminder, I’m already planning my 50th even though I’m still in denial about having reached my mid-late forties!!

So, what did happen to 2018?  I don’t honestly know….did I keep to my plans, did I achieve what I set out to achieve, did the year end in the way I expected, or has it turned out to be a big disappointment?!  I quite like this ‘end of year’ rounding up of things because it makes me sit down and look through things, read diaries, scroll through photos – dare I say it, scroll through social media posts….I love all the reminders and yet again, while I question where on earth has this year gone?  what on earth have I spent my time doing?  what have I got to show for the end of another year?…..all of that…….I love the memories that have been hidden away, waiting for the New Year’s Eve reminder!

I started out 2018, not with New Year’s Resolutions but with ‘intentions’…in a notebook I had written, to have intentions one has to be intentional.  So in 2018 I intended ……to live every day the best I can, to look for the positive and not see the negative, to find the good in people/situations….to see Jesus in my everyday and to ‘include’ Him and see Him not just a coincidence – to look to Him for answers and trust Him, not try to sort and fix things myself!  And the big one, as always….to wait for God’s timing…. in everything!  Aargh!

  

When you find yourself in a place of waiting, how difficult is it to just ….wait?!  Exactly!  And that’s the place that we have been in, for a while now.  Because I am ‘patiently waiting’, I have been unable to write blogs…..it’s the same as I said at the end of last year, it’s not that I don’t have hundreds of blog posts going around in my head, my thoughts haven’t just stopped, I just can’t write at the moment and I am hoping the block is lifted soon because as I sit here with my laptop, Christmas tree lights twinkling (probably for the last day of this season), everyone else is asleep, I am reminded how much I enjoy sitting and tapping away on the keyboard, getting my thoughts out there.

Maybe it’s that our thoughts, lessons, the things that God is speaking to us about during seasons of waiting….maybe they are literally that – ours!  Not to share with the world and his brother!  Maybe the silence from my keyboard is because all the thoughts and ponderings, all the questions, all the ahh I get it now, all the oh I see, have been for me…..they have been helping me, shaping me….preparing me for whatever happens when the waiting is over?  Hmmmm…….

The questions, did I keep to my plans, did I live everyday the best I could, did I always see the postive rather than negative, did I always see the good in people/situations, did I see Jesus in my everyday, did I include Him, did I trust God and His timing?  I think I can say I gave it a good shot, but I know I could have done better!  And I think those intentions are exactly what I will be taking with me into 2019, hoping I do better than this year?!

So, goodbye 2018….the year I reached 46, my first baby became 21, the man and I celebrated our anniversary in Venice again, we celebrated the boy’s GCSE results and prom, we’ve started again with GCSE and A levels, we’ve almost come to the end of uni with one and half way through with another,  amazingly we had proper SNOW and even more amazingly, we were all home and able to enjoy it together!  There were football matches…what I mean is, we went to Wembley!  We may not have got the result we wanted but I had a brilliant road trip with the lads!  There were cinema trips….Peter Rabbit (not quite like the original but hey!), The Mountain Between Us (the less said about that!), Goodbye Christopher Robin, The Greatest Showman, Christopher Robin,  I sobbed within seconds of the start of the long awaited Mama Mia 2 ♥ There was a girls theatre trip to see The Little Mermaid (not helped by the man sat in front with his horrible aftershave!), and another girls only trip pottery painting.   There has been a lot of knitting and I have got myself back into sewing this year making curtains, blankets, books, cushions, hot water bottle covers….I am determined that all my Christmas gifts will be made in 2019!  I finally mastered crochet….well, a bit of basic crochet but have been given a great book to keep me occupied next year!  We’ve had road trips to St Ives, Falmouth, Hertford, Milton Keynes, Bristol, Yeovil, the man and I took a mammoth road trip with rainbows all the way and sunsets on the way back, we took what was probably the last annual family camping trip and I discovered the joy of Pot Noodles, we have filled up the freezer with the tons of blackberries we picked nearby, I haven’t run much this year but was surprised to find that I had been more than I realised, I discovered the fun that is Miranda’s Maracattack!  I have enjoyed the flowers appearing in the garden but I have missed watching the seasons change because I haven’t been running so much, I have spotted so many rainbows this year which I always take as a personal reminder that everything is going to be okay…..we’ve had church film afternoons, ladies afternoon cream teas, the ladies have studied all the women of the Bible (we may’ve missed a couple out!), we’ve had the most fun at a Christmas party ever and had a lovely Carol Service too.  

As ever, there have been highs and there have been lows, we’ve had good news and not so good  news, we’ve heard happy news and also not so happy news, we’ve had some very funny moments, real belly laughs but we’ve also had some very sad moments too.  There has been laughter and there have been tears (a combination of the two on Christmas Eve when I found my turkey hadn’t fully defrosted yet!).  However, with everything that has been going on, all we have gone through, everything we are waiting for, this year more than ever, I have found myself to be in a place of peace….knowing without any doubt whatsoever, that God is completely in control, that every step I have taken this year has been trusting Him, waiting for him to ‘tell me’, almost gobsmacked tbh, when the answer hasn’t been NO!  When He hasn’t closed the door on things and we seem to still be moving forward, on into 2019…and until He tells us stop!  don’t go that way, don’t do this or that….then we carry on, walking and trusting in Him and whatever He says.

Earlier on in the year I wrote down something I got from UCB and it said this.. waiting means trusting that God knows what He is doing even when He doesn’t give you all the details.  And really, that sums up not only 2018 but life in general.  Learning to trust God completely and utterly, so that even when we can’t see the way ahead clearly at all, when everything in front is so uncertain, so unknown, so blurry….to KNOW absolutely that God has got this and He really is in control… all we need to do is wait for Him, for His timing (which by the way is ALWAYS right!).  He won’t ever leave us, abandon us and whatever is going on around us, when we let go of control ourselves and trust Him completely, there is always peace.

 

“The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you”.   Deuteronomy 31:8

“So do not fear, for I am with you;
    do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
    I will uphold you with my righteous right hand”.  Isaiah 41:10

“But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.  Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid”.  John 14:26-27

As I come to the end of this (longer than I planned) blog post, I have to say that it kind of goes without saying but needs to be said…..2018 would not have been the amazing year it has turned out to be without the love and support of my husband, my children, my closest friends without whom I possibly could at times, go completely…. doolally!   We’ve had lovely times this Christmas with family and church family and I am frequently reminded that there are people out there who are not so blessed as we are and we mustn’t take all this for granted!

I’m excited for 2019 and for all the love, laughter, friendship, joy and whatever else it is going to bring (New Years Day football for a start!).

Now I am off to open my jar of memories…..I highly recommend everyone makes one of these jars this year ♥

And so we’ve reached the end of 2017…

I can’t believe we’re here again, the end of another year.

I say it every year….where did that go?  I know that every year the months seem to just fly by, but 2017….what happened to you?  Seriously, one minute we were just starting out, the possibilities, the hopes, the dreams….they were endless.  Now here we are, less than 24 hours before the start of 2018 and I don’t even know how we got here!

To be honest, I probably wouldn’t have been here had my youngest not said mummy, are you going to do your yearly roundup?  Obviously, I don’t literally mean not been here but what with everything that has been going on, I can’t write!  Well, I can write, I have endless blog posts going through my head but I can’t actually write them…..everything is a bit too close, a bit too ‘sensitive’, a bit too ‘private’ even!  I half-write them and then have to give up….one day maybe!

I do find it quite helpful though, to look back over the year…..there is always far far more that has happened than what initially jumps out to start with!  Before I started looking through my photos and remembering things that had happened, I had thought that 2017 topped 2016 in finishing me off!  I was quite convinced that 2017 had got the better of me….it just seems that everything has been so busy that there hasn’t been a minute to sit and take it all in!

Haha, looking over my blog post from the end of 2016….have I achieved what I intended?!  Maybe, maybe not!  To be honest, I’m not really sure what my intentions were…..to stay home on a Monday, to read more, to run less ‘religiously’, to write more again, ?  Hmm…..

 Among my ‘intentions’ this year was to read the Bible through from cover to cover but with no reading plan!  I got myself a new Bible….a colouring one!  Let’s just say, I didn’t reach the back cover….not in the right order anyway, so sometime in 2018 I might reach the back cover.  Something tells me that I will never finish colouring all the pictures in though, lol!

I think I can safely say that I definitely achieved the run less religiously intention!  I have hardly been running – probably averaging once a week.  As with everything, I wonder how I ever had the time to go more than that!  Life is definitely far busier than when I used to go out to work!  It does mean that when I do actually go out to run I am going because I want to, there’s nothing else I have to do and nowhere else to be so I am not squeezing it in because I have to!

So, in the year I became 45….things were off to a great start – I went along to the new year bank holiday football match with the lads!  Yeah, it would appear that somewhere in the approach to reaching my mid-forties (!), I realised I quite like going along to the football!  There’s nothing quite like the buzz when you’re on the winning side, but boy it’s not good when you’re losing!  I have learnt that on these occasions, no words are the right words – my son and my husband don’t want to hear my motherly words of support…..you know the ones – it’s not the winning, it’s the taking part or oh well, at least we won the other day or well that’s life, sometimes you win and sometimes you lose.  Yes, on these occasions, stay quiet!

Only a few weeks into the new year we heard the news that someone we knew had suddenly passed away.  Whilst sad it was a real reminder to me that you really don’t know how long you have – we put things off until tomorrow,  maybe we speak words that we think we can try and take back – tomorrow….but sometimes, tomorrow doesn’t come.  To me, it was the reminder to live every day the best I can, making the most of situations, trying at best to live peacefully with those around me……so, my 45th birthday was a bizarre occasion really – I went to the funeral of a friend.  Even now, nearly a year on I find myself looking around expecting her to turn up to our ladies group, then I remember.

     

The year has flown by at such a speed.  I thought nothing of ‘significance’ had happened…..but the year I became 45 it seems there were quite significant events after all – we had a new pet hamster join us called Bartholomew Jehoshaphat (!), an interview meant a girly roadtrip to Swansea, a (half) family day out to Hampton Court, the man and I celebrated our second wedding anniversary visiting the Tower of Pisa, Lake Garda. the Dolomites and Venice – whilst we say it was the last time we would be going to Venice, I say watch this space…….♥ one of us reached the grand age of 18 and officially became an adult, she had a surprise party, passed her driving test and A levels and has also started university and has already delivered babies!  one of us became a non-teenager, started a second year of university and made me become ‘the girlfriend’s mother’!, a road trip with the youngest to Cheddar Gorge via Bristol Airport which was quite fun….we had to pull into a layby to watch the butting goats on the rocks on the side of the road!, we all spent possibly the wettest week ever camping at New Wine – as with everything they say, “there’s no such thing as bad weather just inappropriate clothing” –  a whole week of wellie boots, raincoats and we haven’t been put off, possibly even more determined to go back in 2018 because it has to be sunny…please!  one of us is half-way through GCSEs and now it’s the dreaded trying to choose what to do next, we’ve had college open days, sixth form visits….just when you get through it all with one child you start all over with the next….and then the next, when this one’s sorted it will be time for the youngest!  my parents moved to a new house after 40 years of living in the previous, we had a surprise 50th wedding anniversary celebration for them in the summer with all their children and grandchildren, we had a surprise 90th birthday party for the man’s nan,  at the grand age of 45 I ventured to the cinema alone – never done before and will definitely be doing again!, went on a spontaneous girly outing and went on the Babbacombe Cliff Railway, been to a few football matches and even had a whole family trip to the football just the once!,  one of us has done dance exams and piano exams – I must say, I do enjoy the ¾ hour sitting in the dance place while she has her lessons – I take my knitting! I’ve done a lot of knitting this year – making blankets, I’ve been really excited to have grown raspberry bushes in pots on the decking, we’ve had a family cinema trip to see Cars 3 (it was a must after Cars was such a major part of our life for so many years!), one of us had the end of year dance show which I was gutted to miss but it clashed with our Church Carol Service – I think it was the first time I have had to miss a performance that one of my children has taken part in (thank goodness for grandmas who are able to step in and play the part ♥), 

  

– there have been countless games of Words with Friends, monthly film afternoons at Church, ladies breakfast, afternoon tea and even Christmas Dinner, I think I’ve spent quite a few hours this year sitting in hospital waiting rooms – sometimes with family and sometimes with friends – I think I’ve seen the inside of all the main hospitals in the whole of the county this year! Christmas parties, the Hallelujah party, ladies Bible studies…..as I said last year, I never expected to find myself spending much of my time with people older than me and much older!  It’s funny because apart from a couple of close friends nearer to my own age down here, I have been reminded that all my friends live miles away!  However, I am grateful as ever, to all my friends for still being there, wherever they are…and how especially lovely it is when they make it down to visit for a long overdue cuppa & catch up!  

All in all, there always seems to have been something going on!  It’s funny because looking through all the things that have gone on over the last twelve months has made me completely forget that I thought it was pants!  When you look to find all the good things, you soon forget all the other things that seem to have been ‘hanging over you’.  All the happy memories and photographs are such a reminder that life is good, no matter what!  That whatever we are waiting for or hoping for, whatever we have questions about, living in the ‘unknown’ about ….all of that – they don’t really matter because whatever happens when I look back and see all the good, happy memories full of fun, laughter, happiness and love, these things far outweigh the stuff that wasn’t quite what I had thought would happen this year, the unanswered questions, the unanswered prayers, the dreaded ‘unknown’!  Again, another reminder to me for next year…..look for the positive things everyday instead of dwelling on the negative!

 Well, I never thought I would write such a long blog….sorry!  That’s what happens when you don’t write anything for a long time!  All that is left to say is thank you to my husband, my children, my family and good friends…all who have been there this year and who I know will be there next year too!

I am looking forward to a year’s time…when I sit here writing about the absolutely amazing year 2018 has turned out to be….and I am looking forward to looking through all the photos and reading the memories stored up in my jar!

2016…I wasn’t prepared!

I’ve been thinking a lot lately – I guess the end of another year tends to bring that about.  However, this year has been different.  I have had so much going on, so much thinking has taken place but I have had a complete inability to write.  I think mainly because of all the situations and happenings that have gone on (there comes a point when you know you just have to leave your thoughts where they are and keep them to yourself!).

~♥~

It’s odd – you know when someone asks you, where do you see yourself in 5 years time?  Where do you see yourself in 10 years time?

Well, this Christmas marks 5 years from the Christmas that changed things completely for me.  If someone had asked me back then, where do you see yourself in 5 years time? I would never in a million years have seen myself where I am now, and I never would have believed that 5 years would have gone by soooo quickly!

It’s mad how life can be so different yet some things are just the same!

~♥~

When I started to look back over 2016, I was convinced it had been a terrible year –  annus horribilis as the Queen once said!  but actually, as I sit here now, looking back through the photos, I have been reminded of the good times, funny moments, family days out, family holidays, parties, special occasions, embarrassing moments, sad moments, exceedingly happy moments – I can see that whilst it hasn’t been great all the time, there has been far more good stuff going on and if I’m not careful, I can let the bad stuff overshadow it, can’t I?

 I knew that 2016 was going to be a tough year, simply because my first baby was going to be leaving home, I knew I was going to be devastated but I wasn’t prepared for just how emotional it would all be!  Aside from that, I wasn’t prepared for all the other ‘tough stuff to deal with’, that was to come my way this year……I wasn’t prepared for the complete and utter sadness I would feel when a local homeless man died, I wasn’t prepared for just how much it would hit me.  I wasn’t prepared for the feeling of betrayal by people who were meant to be friends, finding myself and those close to me being blamed for other people’s issues.  One of the hardest things this year for me, has been keeping my mouth shut!  I have so wanted to shout from the roof tops, it’s not my fault!  I wasn’t prepared for the complete and utter lack of ‘structure’ and ‘routine’ to my days – it took me a while to ‘get’ that this was it, this was my life now…..it was up to me to work out what I should be doing on what day, who I should be seeing, who I should be helping…or not!  I wasn’t prepared for how completely draining some people can be – I wasn’t prepared to have to choose to stop helping someone because no matter what I said or did, I couldn’t fix them – only God could do that.   I wasn’t prepared for how difficult it would be to not have any wages coming in – but then I knew we had everything we needed and more, I guess I learned more so this year, that what we think we need and what we do actually need….God knows and He provides.

~♥~

Looking on the brighter side of things…….I wasn’t prepared to find myself becoming good friends with people, double my age….and older!   I wasn’t prepared to find these were the people I spent much of my time with.  I wasn’t prepared to find that people genuinely cared for me and my family, that they really love us and pray for us everyday.  I wasn’t prepared to find that some of the best days of this year were spent just sitting, chatting and spending time with people who aren’t related but have become family to me.  I wasn’t prepared for the kindness of people, who popped something in an envelope so my family could have an extra treat when we were away.  I wasn’t prepared for the generosity of a friend who surprised me with a gift that they knew I wanted but couldn’t buy….just because they wanted me to have it!  I wasn’t prepared for the surprise of an amazing gift of a much needed holiday in a few weeks time.  I wasn’t prepared to find that the majority of my time would be spent doing things for and with other people, with rarely a minute to myself, yet somehow managing to survive!  I wasn’t prepared for how much my children would accept that this is it and just go with the flow!

I guess I just wasn’t prepared for the reality of being a (full-time) pastor’s wife!  Unfortunately, I wasn’t prepared by being given a ‘how to be’ book to read!  I wasn’t prepared to find that suddenly my life wasn’t just me, my husband, my kids…..it was all of that and so much more.

So I can honestly say, if you had asked me back then, where do you see yourself in 5 years time?  I would never ever have suggested that this is where I would be!  2016 has possibly been one of the toughest years of my life but it hasn’t finished me off!  If anything, it has made me even stronger, and more determined to be the best wife, mama, friend, daughter, sister – oh, and pastor’s wife!  

~♥~

 Hmm, I have read my intentions for 2016 and wonder if I achieved them!  Did I live making the best of each day?  Did I do more reading, writing, running, taking photos?  Have I got to the end of 2016 and am I surprised at how much I have done, how many places I have been to??

I guess I will have to own up to having allowed the tough stuff to cloud the good stuff but on closer inspection…..2016 has been filled with great stuff!

2016, the year I turned 44 –  my husband took me for coffee high up in the Dolomite mountains, I waved one of my children off on a coach to stay with a family in another country, became that mum in wellie boots watching her son play rugby, became that mum that sits in the car outside reading while her daughter has a piano lesson, started wearing glasses for reading (ssh, and for threading needles!), ran nearly 333 miles, went to pilates, had 2 of my girls taking piano exams, had a park picnic with my oldest friend – just like the old days 25+ years ago but now with our children!, my second child passed her driving theory test, I took my eldest to vote for the first time and put my X in the box for the Brexit vote, had the French exchange girl come to stay for a week, had the annual family camping trip, had a 3 night family trip to London, had my first proper filling, rekindled my love of knitting!  knitted a blanket for a friend’s new baby, knitted a squidgy out of shape bunny rabbit for someone – everyone should have a ‘rad’,  packed my first baby and her rad off to university expecting her home any minute only to find she has settled into life in her new town/church and Christian Union – resulting in overcoming my phobia of video calls so we can Skype (thank goodness for modern technology eh!), have been amazed at the flexibility of my youngest child who never stops dancing/stretching/bending/doing the splits, been on several road trips with #2 daughter to university open days, taken #3 daughter to her dance exam, my not so little boy is now towering over me and became rugby player of the year, #2 daughter is taller than me now too, been to my first ever real live football match, completed the One Year Bible, read a few books but not nearly enough!, taken loads of photos, completed ‘3 things to be thankful for today’ every night, had a month off FB….and dare I say it – survived!, went to Gloucester Cathedral to see the grave of Edward II, went around Venice by water taxi, had a medical, had a Wimbledon tea towel brought home for me, bought ‘mother & son’ West Ham t-shirts, watched all of Anne of Green Gables,  saw The Lady of Shallott at Tate Britain, visited Dartmoor Prison Museum, watched The Lord of The Rings Trilogy for the first time, I ran beside the sea for the first time, took my son to watch the rugby on the big screen at Sandy Park, had breakfast at Ikea, and so much more….. after a brilliant family Christmas I’ve started to look forward to next year’s already!

We have exciting times ahead of us, so to all of you travelling along the road with us, thank you for being there this past year and we look forward to what’s in store next year…… 2016, I wasn’t prepared for you but after all the lessons you’ve brought me – 2017, I think I am better prepared!!!

~♥~

“But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”

Philippians 3:13-14

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

Romans 8:28

…another year over, a new year has begun

How did we get to the end of 2015 already?

It doesn’t seem a whole twelve months ago that we were nearing the end of 2014…..I had ‘high hopes’ for 2015 and in fairness, 2015 didn’t let me down at all.  In all honesty, I don’t think that I realised quite what a great year it had been, until now when looking back over it!

So much happens from day to day, life is so busy and we tend to forget or just take for granted, all the ‘good’ going on, don’t we?

January started with great intentions – by the end of 2015 I would be the best mother to my children, the best girlfriend to the man, the best friend to my BFF’s, best employee at work, all round best person.  Okay, so maybe I wasn’t setting out to be the best person, but I fully intended to give my best, to all of these things, all at the same time!

By the end of January, just when I thought I was failing miserably already – I was engaged and you could say the rest of the year has whizzed by in a blur……

six weeks later I married my bestest friend in the world and we began our happily ever after…...

for the first time in about 20 years I finally went on an airplane……

I have carried on with my eagerness to visit places I haven’t been to before, and re-visiting places I’ve not been to for many years – I have continued to be a tourist at home and now abroad too…..

from Venice to Stonehenge, Salisbury to Torquay, Newport to Clovelly….

London to Dartmoor, Cheddar Gorge to Cardiff….

Falmouth to Dunkeswell, ….

Staying closer to home….

Paris & Disneyland….

So much has happened during the last year from family weddings, big family reunions, children leaving junior school, becoming a teenager, GCSE results, leaving school, A Level results, leaving college, becoming an adult, learning to drive, being bridesmaids, walking your mum down the aisle, finally a family holiday abroad……I’ve made my first meringue, made a proper Christmas dinner – even roasting my first turkey, catered for a wedding, arranged a surprise party – somehow I haven’t done much of the things I thought I would do – I stopped writing a journal when I got married but I miss it and I think I suffer from writer’s block now…..I haven’t run as far as I thought I would but I ran 150 miles in 2015 that’s at least a hundred more than I thought I’d done …..we’ve heard happy news and sad news, good news and bad news – I’ve heard of friends losing loved ones and I’ve celebrated with friends expecting new loved ones, I’ve had friends see me through tough days and I’ve been able to be there for friends going through tough days too….I’ve found friendships restored, good friendships become stronger and closer no matter the distance or age for that matter….

I don’t honestly know how many thousands of photographs I have taken this year but I’m glad I’ve been able to look through them all and remember the happy days, the fun times, the great places visited, lovely views seen, the beautiful surroundings we are blessed with….

I lost my job at the end of November too and whilst some may panic, I feel peace, more than ever!  In 2015 I have definitely learned to trust God more and believe that He really does speak, to me!!  As always, this year I have found, that He is the only one who is trustworthy, dependable, the one to turn to in any situation FIRST……why do we always have to keep finding these things out?  Why do we not just know it and automatically do it?!

Although I didn’t think my year had been anything spectacular, I realise I have been really truly blessed this year!

I am looking forward to 2016 whatever it may bring…..every day we are given on this earth is a privilege and we must live each and every day the best we can, making the most of everything….I intend to do far more reading, writing and running, and taking photographs of course!  I hope that this time next year I will be surprised at how much I have actually done and by the places I have visited.

I hope that I will be able to sum up 2016 as one where I have made the most of every day and loved everyone the best I can.

After the best Christmas, all that is left for 2015 is to read all the things that I have written and put in my box!

and to wish you all a very happy and blessed 2016.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
 in all your ways submit to Him,
    and He will make your paths straight”.

Proverbs 3:5-6

“This is what the Lord says— He who made a way through the sea, a path through the mighty waters, “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland”.

Isaiah 43:16, 18-19

New Year…resolutions…goals….aims??

Okay, it’s a bit of a delayed Happy New Year! being on Day 11 already, but hey….

~* . *~ Happy New Year ~* . *~

I have been thinking about this blog for a few weeks now, and as ever, it really did come about from a conversation with friends in a kitchen, clearing up after a party…about whether or not we would be making any New Year Resolutions.

As tends to be the way with anything, parties, events etc, there always seems to be the same people left clearing up, tidying away and basically helping out.  I overheard one of them jokingly say I’m giving up washing the dishes for my New Year’s Resolution.  Whilst it was all said in jest, and the reply given in the same manner – ooh, servant hearts only in here please! – it has had me thinking for the last couple of weeks,  and really I think it’s something I’ve been thinking about for quite a while now….it just so happens that it all comes together quite nicely with New Year’s Resolutions!

It got me thinking….as Christians, followers of Jesus Christ, we are called to imitate Him, to be like Him….to be servant hearted.  However, are we really servant hearted towards eachother…do our thoughts and our actions correspond with eachother?

In our daily lives, do we reach out to people, do we show them the love of Christ…do we lay down our life for friends?  Do we do things for other people, with no ulterior motive, other than love…because we are being Christ-like?

Granted, I don’t (ever) relish the idea of touching anyone else’s feet, let alone washing them, yet Jesus washed His disciples feet and we are meant to be like Jesus towards eachother.  Okay, so maybe we don’t physically have to wash eachother’s feet, but we should humble ourselves in the same manner.

For me, personally, the conversation after the party, was a reminder to me that everything I do and say is highly likely to be overheard or actually listened to, and maybe, even if I think that no one is listening to us or watching, SOMEONE is always present, in every conversation I have, whether it is in my head, or in the actual words that come out of my mouth!

~♥~

We may not set resolutions for the new year but EVERYDAY we should be living and aiming to be a better version of ourselves than we were yesterday!

Life isn’t about ourself – it is all about Jesus.  It is about us becoming more like Him, in everything we say and do….about our character being changed so that we are Christ-like.  The people we come across,  they may be that bit of sandpaper that is going to smooth off our rough edges, making us respond in a more loving, kind, gentle manner or we in fact may be the soothing balm (yeah!!) whose words and actions are the medicine that some else needs at that moment.

When we start living for other people and meeting their needs, and stop living expecting other people to meet our  needs – when we start living a life where we put others before ourselves, rather than wonder why people aren’t putting us first (!)….when we start living like Jesus….everyday….then we will be living a servant life, putting others before ourselves, laying our lives down for other people….putting other’s needs before our own.

We need to remember that we are meant to be Christ-like….to everyone!  I can only look at myself and think, would Jesus have said that to that person…in that tone?!  Would He have spoken in that way about that person?  It’s cheesy but it’s the way I am trying to look at things everyday….what would Jesus do?  The answer every time, is, He would love.

Last year I decided to study The Fruit of the Spirit and go through all the attributes individually – “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Galations 5:22-23), however, I started with love and I have got no further because there is so much to learn!!   Whatever I look at, study etc, the answer is always love.  It is all about love.  God is love.  We love  because He loved us first – 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 tells us that love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails.

If you read it another way….am I patient…am I kind…am I gentle…am I kind…am I proud…am I boastful…am I easily angered…do I keep a record of wrongs???

We claim to be Christ-followers but sometimes we are a bit choosy about the verses we really take to heart, really take on board and live by!

And so, for me, I may not make  New Year’s Resolutions as such, but every day I am making a resolution to be more the person I am meant to be…more like Jesus.  Granted, it is easier some days than others but there is grace and forgiveness and every day we live, we are given a new day to carry out our ‘resolution’.

So, maybe we have decided we are choosing not to give up things as New Year’s Resolutions…we are making it our ‘goal’ to be more Christlike….then we are effectively giving up things, aren’t we…I’m giving up being impatient, I’m giving up being unkind, I’m giving up being all those things that are the opposite of love.

Another year over….

 How excited was I a couple of weeks ago when one of my closest friends sent me a message saying they would be down this way for a couple of days and did I fancy meeting up….doh! of course I did!  One of the downsides of being a ‘grown up’ I find, is that my closest friends seem to live the furthest away – when the chance of a face-to-face cuppa and catchup comes unexpectedly, well that is a Christmas present in itself, isn’t it?!

It doesn’t matter how long it’s been since you’ve seen eachother in the flesh does it?  You carry on as though it was only yesterday.  Distance cannot take away a true friendship, but it can and should make you appreciate it all the more, shouldn’t it?  And as it goes, every time….there never is enough time.

As we talked, we both were saying we couldn’t believe it was nearly Christmas, that we had reached the end of another year!  How fast had this year gone….and as the conversation went on, there was a bit of confession on both sides, that this year hadn’t really been quite as we had expected it to be, hoped it would be even…maybe we were a little bit disappointed with things and couldn’t see how things were any different to how they had been twelve months ago!

Sometimes you need a cuppa and catch up with your bestie, to be told good grief, of course things are different!  It’s great to be told by someone else that they can actually see a difference in you from the twelve months gone!

And for both of us, where we think there has been disappointment, to be reminded that that is just a fraction of our life, isn’t it?  There is so much more going on and to let the disappoinment of something cast a shadow over everything else..well that’s not how it should be, should it?!

~♥~

And so, as the end of 2014 was approaching, I started my own personal review of the year, that it turns out, hasn’t actually been a disappointment at all….it seems to in fact, have been quite an amazing year for me!

Sometimes, we need to take a spoon of the medicine we frequently hand out to other people, practice what we preach even!  Instead of focusing on what disappointed, focus on everything else.  I’ve used my ever-faithful Google to find out what the opposite of disappointment is and the words that spring up are satisfied, calm, cheerful, comforted, contented, enchanted, encouraged, fulfilled, happy, heartened, pleased, unworried, delighted, excited…

Well, that’s a bit to go on, isn’t it?!

~♥~

I have reviewed the whole of my 2014 over the last couple of weeks and have found that in fact, 2014 has possibly been one of my best years yet!  Bearing in mind it hasn’t been in the slightest how I thought it would be, it seems that when I look back over it, I have actually had quite a year and no, I don’t think that I am the same as I was twelve months ago!  When I look back over the last twelve months, there are far more things that have made me the opposite of disappointed….

During 2014, it seems I have written and filled nearly 10 journals…drank maybe 3000 cuppas…ran approximately 300 miles…goodness knows how many miles I’ve walked…I finally managed sit-ups from lying down…I’ve made a point of going to places that I’ve never been to, so I can tick them off my list – I’ve become a tourist where I am – from Land’s End to Dartmoor, Glastonbury to London, I have tried to go to the sea in as many different places as I can, I think I made it to 12 different places…I’ve been to the sea a lot…I seem to have gone from never going to London to being there 3 times in a short space of time…I’ve actually had a little holiday…I’ve had countless coffees with friends…started to study & pray with a friend…I’ve written down 3 things to be grateful for every day…I have ‘done’ 100 days of happy nearly twice…I’ve gone to paint pottery…I’ve played Scrabble far more times than I have won it…I’ve had my first ever surprise day out in 42 years…and even walked in Winter Wonderland!

   

Somehow in 2014, I have been faced with challenges that I never thought I would ever have to face – well, I didn’t have to face them, I chose to!  Early on in the year, I survived Go Ape and whilst that is nothing to some people, to me it meant I had to trust a piece of ‘cord’ to hold me as I flung myself from high trees and let me tell you, being up in the high trees was enough of a challenge!  What a sense of achievement when it was all over….I realised, if I can do this, I can do anything!!!

And I did, I held a snake!

Again, to some people, it’s nothing, but to me…well, I shudder even thinking about things like that, let alone choosing to do it.

I had had a conversation with one of my children that morning and said, sometimes you are given opportunities in life, the result may make no difference to the choices you are making for the rest of your life but you have to decide whether or not to take the opportunity… don’t say you can’t do it when you don’t know that, instead tell yourself you will give it a go and try the best you can.  It doesn’t matter if you do well so long as you do the best you can.  It matters if you tell yourself you can’t do it and then you don’t even try to do it.  We had been talking about choosing to do an ‘extra’ exam, nothing to do with snakes but when I was standing in front of the snake I was reminded of my words and suddenly I couldn’t not hold it, could I?!

~♥~

The whole of the year I seem to have been overcoming challenges, confronting fears…finding that I can do things, things that I would never have thought I can do, let alone try…I mastered wallpapering, unblocking drains, re-connecting pipes, re-sealing tiles…I’ve become a dab-hand at DIY!

However, I know that through all of these challenges, I didn’t do them on my own…I know that every step I have taken during 2014, I have not been on my own and helpless.  I know more than ever that God has been with me, enabling me to face every challenge, whether literally scared for my life flinging myself from a tree right the way through to something as routine as getting from A to B and on to C,  and being flustered because they are all at the same time!   He has sent friends along at just the time when I have been despairing and literally don’t know what to do.  I know that every day He has been the constant and always will be….this year I have really been noticing everything around me, not only have I been more aware of my surroundings, I have seen so many beautiful sunrises and sunsets…and the moon… I have made a point of looking for God in my normal every day.  Instead of hearing other people tell me about the great things God has been doing in their life and wondering where He is in mine, I have been actively looking to see all the little things He does in my normal every day and I have been amazed at the answers to prayers that have at times, almost been flippant ones!  I have been amazed with answers to prayers that only I know I have prayed…I’ve been known to say to God I’d believe it if a random stranger came up and told me.  Well, should I have been surprised when a random stranger came up to me and told me, or should I take it as confirmation that He really is there, He really sees me and He hears everything?  When I said to God, okay, so I’m getting desperate now…I kind of just need something that fits the bill to just land in my lap – do I think it is just a coincidence when something does ust land in my lap, at just the right time, or do I see that God sees everything, He knows exactly what I need, He knows exactly when I need it and He provides at just the right time?

So, this year I think I have been learning to trust God…more…and learning that that means, in every area of my life!!

And so, as 2014 comes to an end…the year that I think I stepped more and more out of my comfort zone…I am truly grateful to my children for putting up with their fraught mother and being the best company ever…my man simply because he’s my man…my friends who are there day and night, with coffee or tea and tissues…without any of you, my life just wouldn’t be the same…you make every day a good day and a good day, even better!

All I have left to do now in 2014 is open  my box and read all the things I have written down throughout the year…things to remind me even further, what a brilliant year I have really had.

Something I have realised this year is that, in the end, it is all about love! We can never give enough of it and we can never show enough of it…and that’s my challenge for me for 2015….to love more, to love well, to love better.

Happy New Year!

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails”.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

New year, new you?

This morning I am enjoying the peace!

That makes it sounds like our home is usually very noisy…well, it’s not!  Not really, considering how many children there are here, but there is always something going on, there are always voices coming from somewhere, music coming from maybe more than one room at a time, the television is more often than not a background noise…but it is NOT noisy, it is the sound of happy.  Granted to those with only one or two children, or even no children,  it may appear noisy but then I know of homes with only a couple of children where the chaos more than outdoes the daily sound here!

I wouldn’t be without the sound of our home, the happy voices, the excited ones, the sad ones, dare I say it, even the occasional whingeing ones…

“My people will live in peaceful dwelling places,
    in secure homes,
    in undisturbed places of rest”.
Isaiah 32:18

This morning, I literally am just enjoying the peace and quiet that is very noticeable on the first day of a school term!

It’s a good day for the start of school term in this house….a Wednesday.  My ‘short’ day at work, my day for a run….my day to stay home and do whatever I need to do.  I like Wednesdays!

Last year I had myself a great routine on a Wednesday, school drop off, run, come home & shower, seeing as I had the TV controls to myself I tended to watch a bit of the old Christian television, I would read, write, blog…somehow or other Wednesdays have got out of routine.  I don’t know how but I know we have just had over a month tied up with Christmas and things Christmas related going on….but where has my routine gone, the structure to my days?!

This morning, I went for an early run and was home for 7.15am, children were dropped to school by 8.15am and suddenly I was a bit lost…wasn’t sure what I was meant to be doing!!  I was ahead of myself in that I had done the run, showered etc but now I had hours to go until time to set off for work!  The house is relatively tidy…suddenly it was just me!

Sometimes you can be your own worst enemy!  When you are left alone with your thoughts, all sorts of things can try and target you, try to get you down.  Situations and conversations can play over in your mind and you can literally make yourself completely doolally (okay you may not admit it, but I will!).

I’ve had to give myself a hard kick in the backside, a stern talking to even….remind myself that there are ‘things’, ‘habits’, ‘thought processes’ and the such, that have been left behind with 2013.  They have no place in trying to tag along into 2014 with me…..it wasn’t working particularly well so I switched on the television!!!

Isn’t it amazing how sometimes, quite often actually, God knows what you need to hear and when you need to hear it.  The message that I heard this morning was exactly what I needed to hear….it was exactly what I had been trying to tell myself already, somehow it sounds better coming from someone else doesn’t it, almost more believable!

Amongst other things that I heard this morning, was something I have been thinking about for some months now, and that is the way we speak about ourselves, our lives, our situations etc!  Maybe we moan or complain…grumble about our life, our  job, our situation?!  We go on about how dire things are, we moan to our friends, our colleagues and we even moan to God.  We talk about things as though there is no hope, this is it, things will never get better, they will never change and as we talk about things in a miserable way, we allow ourselves to wallow, to feel sorry for ourselves – and it’s a vicious circle because the more we feel sorry for ourselves, the worse we feel about everything, the worse we feel, the more we talk about it!

And so….I got to thinking!  The things we are saying, we are therefore hearing, and so we are taking them on board aren’t we, playing them over in our mind.  If we continue to do this, the negative becomes extra baggage that we are carrying around, letting it weigh us down.    If you had someone in your life talking to you in this way, (about you),  you wouldn’t put up with it would you, you would stand up for yourself?  So why do you allow yourself to talk to you like that?!  More to the point, why do you allow yourself to believe it?

And as I boiled the kettle to make my Cup A Soup, actually, it was as I got out the packet of Ryvitas, it came to me!

We spend a lot of time trying to keep our bodies in shape….we can go for a run, go to the gym, do exercises at home, all in the vein hope that in some small way, we are improving our physical well-being, getting our bodies into shape.   At this time of year, so many of us are on ‘healthy eating plans’ trying to shift the extra couple of pounds that have somehow attached themselves to us over the festive period.  It may not be that we have over-eaten as such, but all the ‘extra’ chocolates and sweets that have been free-flowing have done more harm to us than good!

Naturally, we are gutted!

It goes to show though, you can kid yourself that you’re only eating a couple of chocolates (at a time) so it won’t do any harm but that’s nonsense isn’t it!  There have obviously been more than a couple of chocolates!  The extra pounds confirm so, if we aren’t careful, it’s a slippery slope!

Well, it is just like that with our inner self isn’t it?  Do we look after ourselves emotionally as well as we try to look after ourselves physically?  By speaking the negative stuff, that is what we end up hearing.  We continually take these words on-board and they have an impact on us, on our emotional well-being don’t they?  Granted, we don’t allow this intentionally, we don’t realise the damage we are doing to ourselves.  Just like the small amount of chocolates we ate over Christmas…we don’t see the damage until we take a proper look!

Just as we find with our physical bodies, by allowing ourselves even a little bit of the wrong thing, over a short period of time, the change starts to take place and not for the better and we are desperate to do something about it! It is the same with our inner self, it starts with a few negative words but over time they can accumulate to cause much harm also.

There is a challenge we need to set ourselves as we head into the new year….to make sure we are looking after ourselves on the inside as well as the outside.  We need to take care of what we are feeding ourselves spiritually, emotionally, internally…we need to watch the way we are speaking about ourselves, what we are hearing so that we are not listening to negative words, the mopey woe is me ones, the it’ll never get better ones, the will it ever change ones…and so the list goes on.  We need to make sure that we are listening to the right voices, the ones that will speak the truth into us and not feed us with lies.  We need to make sure that we are feeding and caring for ourselves properly everyday…spiritually as well as physically.  We need to be feeding ourselves with the Word of God so that we are hearing His voice above any other.

As with our physical bodies, when we take care of ourselves, feed ourselves with the right food, we feel better, we are on form…when we feed ourselves spiritually with the right food, we also ‘feel better’, are ‘on form’, our thought patterns and the words we speak will change as we read and believe the Truth that God says to us and about us.

“When Your words came, I ate them;
    they were my joy and my heart’s delight,
for I bear Your name,
    Lord God Almighty”.
Jeremiah 15:16

“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work”.
2 Timothy 3:16-17

“Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word about Christ.”
Romans 10:17

“Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God”.
Matthew 4:4

“Your word is a lamp for my feet,
    a light on my path”.
Psalm 119:105

Christmas, put away or here to stay?

Noooo!  There’s  a hole in my lounge where Christmas used to be!!

And so it was time to do it…I took down the Christmas tree (cutting off all the branches!) and tidied away all the decorations  – and now, other than the chocolates that still seem to be in endless supply , you would never really know that Christmas had taken place in this house, visibly that is.

The thought of taking down the tree and packing all the decorations away is always far worse than the actual doing….I’m sure I’m not the only one, but it is the part of Christmas I do always get to do on my own!  For some reason no one  offers to help with the packing away do they?!  That doesn’t bother me, I prefer it that way….I may have lost all my control over how the tree gets decorated but I can at least make sure it all gets packed away safely for another year can’t I!

And funnily enough, packing Christmas away this year got me thinking.  Do we really get out Christmas for one month of the year and then pack it away again, neatly and store it until next year?  Or, do we carry it with us all year through?

This is where I am sure there are some people who will be shrieking at the prospect of Christmas all year through!  But I don’t mean the baubles, tinsel, nicknacks and such.  I don’t mean all the gimmicky parts of Christmas that make it Christmas as the world tends to know it.  I mean do we carry the true meaning of Christmas with us, all year through?

When I look at my lounge now, it is bare!  There is a huge empty space where the Christmas tree stood for a month, the shelves look empty where the Christmas cards were…everything looks empty and bare…..but is it?

For me, I have had the nicest, happiest, most peaceful Christmas I can ever remember having, it really has been the best!  All the money in the world could not have made it so, but being with the ones who truly mean the most to me, spending time together, having fun, doing nothing whilst celebrating the most amazing gift we will ever be given.

Do we only ‘remember’ this amazing gift of Love at Christmas, when we are reminded of it when we watch a nativity or when we sing a Christmas Carol or do we carry it in our hearts every day, whatever time of year it is, wherever we are, whatever we are doing?

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life”.
John 3:16

When God sent His Son into the world, it wasn’t just for Christmas.  You see all the adverts don’t you, that tell you a dog is for life, not just for Christmas?   Well, it’s a bit like that isn’t it…do we just get out God’s love along with all the decorations on 1st December and pack it away again whenever it is we pack away our tree….or do we live with the love of God in our hearts, in our lives, …every day, all the time, all year round?

“This is how God showed His love among us: He sent His one and only Son into the world that we might live through Him.  This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.  Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.  No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and His love is made complete in us.
 This is how we know that we live in Him and He in us: He has given us of His Spirit.  And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent His Son to be the Savior of the world.  If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in them and they in God.  And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them”.
1 John 4:9-16

Another year, another run!

Back to reality, with a bump eh!

Today…the first Saturday of the year, the first Saturday without children, the first run of the year.

Somehow I kind of ‘forgot’ that we have had terrible weather lately, I forgot that it has been raining and raining and raining and there has been flooding!  I guess I ‘forgot’ because it hasn’t really affected me and all the outings we have had lately have involved getting in the car and driving!

As I was running today, I think that the thing that I was thinking (?!) was it’s all the same but it’s different!

And that, kind of sums up life as it is as I head into the New Year, into 2014…..things are the same, but they are different!

“Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back everything is different.”
CS Lewis

What is the same?  Well, I am the same….but I’m different, my home is the same…but it’s different, my children are the same….but they’re different, my friend is the same, but it’s different!

I am the same because I am me, I’m different because I am happy!  I am looking forward to the future not living regretting the past, holding on to things that drag me backwards.  My home is the same but it is a happy home….my children are the same but they’re different, they’re more settled, they are looking forward too, my friend is still my friend, but it’s different now, he’s my man!

Somehow the thoughts came to me when I was running because, to be honest, there aren’t many routes around this town to run that are different, I can try and make them different by cutting up another road or path etc….but today, everything was the same but different  because of all the floods!

Paths that I usually head down were completely …. different.

I found myself having to go through bushes and half up trees to climb over gates that I normally just go through!

 

When I found myself faced with the path flooded whichever way I went, I had to find an alternative method of getting around….I had to shuffle myself along the fence at one point to get where I wanted to be!

When I first started the run, I saw this wall, and I’ve seen it many times but today it made me think of the verse

“……with my God I can scale a wall”
Psalm 18:29

Granted, that isn’t much of a wall to be scaling but it just got me thinking, that whatever we come up against, however high the wall is, whatever is blocking our path, however we have to find our way around a situation, He is always going to be there, He has always been there and He always will be there seeing us through.

Just because everything is the same, but it is different….He is the one Constant that always remains the same and He never changes.

As we head into a new year, a new season, a new chapter….things may look the same in appearance but they are different and things do change, people change, situations change but The Lord never changes.  Whatever we are faced with in this coming year, we can be sure that He will remain constant throughout and where we can’t always see ways through, He will always show us the way to go, and He will be with us every step of the way.

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever”.
Hebrews 13:8